Saturday, November 5, 2011
Response #1 - week 10
WOW! that is long. It is semi-consistent. There is a weird part about the burned child in the hospital that seems like a shift in story, a nice passage, that i know connects with the mother and the black heart and how she is as evil as the virgin mary. But is comes off sort of differently from the other passages. The story is a really nice well not "nice" but intriguing and well illustrated. I am not sure about fusing the biblical with the story because it gets jumbled and confusing somewhat. And im not sure if the questions at the end are needed or not, maybe phrase it without the questions. otherwise very good peice.
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Thanks for the advice. Believe it or not, majority of those biblical references were not my own, but instead, were a part of the original fairy tale I incoporated.I'm confused by the words "semi-consistent" but the rest makes sense to me and I'll try to keep it in my for future drafts. Can you explain that part to me though? Is it because of the section in the hospital that causes inconsistence?
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